Special note: this title features the first-ever Dasha-to-Briana foot “disappearance!”A powerhouse of talent does it all right for its intended couples audience. — Critical Rating: AAAA (AVN) Almost everyone uses his or her own stage name in this tale of two families about to be melded. Retired adult performer Sharon Kane presides over a pair of babes, one punk (Michele Michaels), one a dominating bitch-on-wheels (Briana Banks), while “porn star” Randy Spears has two sons in tow as he plans to propose to Kane: Eric Masterson in his Italian shades and the straighter-looking Mason Rivers. Throw in Dasha as the maid, and it’ll be a marriage made in … well, Hell, but that’s where all the fun people hang, anyway. For those who need a refresher course on How It Should Be Done, go no further than the Kane/Spears match-up, where the veteran blonde has the words and the moves. It’s slow, it’s tender and it’s HOT! On the other hand, we’re not about to warn anyone away from Briana Banks, the bitchy daughter, who not only opens the show with a bit of licking and dildoing with Dasha, but gets both Rivers and Masterson, even though the latter coupling is interrupted twice. Michele likewise gets three scenes: A solo as she masturbates to her own porn video; another one as she does the same again, this time with Eric stroking himself beside her; and a volcanic coupling with Spears that includes reverse cowgirl, mish and a cumshot to her stockings. While not overall worthy of an Editor’s Choice, there’s still plenty to nominate here: Kane for Best Actress; both Banks and Michaels for Best Supporting; David Stanley for Best Director and Best Screenplay; and the show itself for Best Video.
Happily Never After
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